I'm pleased to say that I have a different slant on the subject now. I'm so fickle...all it takes is a month of dating with a TDH rugby playing fireman and the dating garden's all rosy!
All the time I was complaining about the crap first dates with guys I very easily found something wrong with (often when there probably wasn't actually anything wrong with them); I wasn't really thinking too far ahead. Just meeting the right person to 'click' with....fancy the arse off, have a laugh with, have an interesting conversation with and for the feeling to be mutual was kind of the first (and biggest) hurdle.
But then, I found myself on date 2, 3 , 4, 5, 6 and, oh my God.......this was possibly heading into a relationship! Shock Horror!! But I haven't been in a relationship for longer than I'd care to admit and I'd forgotten the dating etiquette. How many dates classify a relationship? Do you have to have 'that conversation'? How do you approach the subject without looking like a cling-on desperado when all you want to know is where you stand? Are you casually dating, therefore seeing other people?
What do you introduce him as? Your boyfriend? Your current shag? Squeeze? Or as I was settling for, the bloke I've been dating.
Picture this: - It's been 6 dates. It's coming up to Christmas. The card shops are full of sloppy 'Boyfriend' cards or ones emblazoned 'To the one I love'. I'm standing there with a highly amused mate, looking flummoxed and feeling a bit pathetically panicky. I mean, doesn't what you choose make a statement? And what if you've both got different ideas of what's going on?
So I played it safe...ish. A Purple Ronnie (To someone Special) card. Funny, opt for funny. Anyway, ater a couple of drunken conversations about taking things slow, seeing how we go and awkwardly being introduced to one of his friends as 'a mate'. 'The conversation' was definitely on the cards. And so it was kind of decided.....
We're not 'just' dating anymore, we like each other, we're not seeing any other people, nor have the intention to - and by introducing me to people as his girlfriend (which they all presumed I was anyway) it doesn't mean things are heading off at a million miles an hour. And I know where I stand, more importantly!
So I really like him, particularly because he doesn't think I'm fat and that my lumpy bits are in fact quite nice! (Mad, 'cos even I don't think that!). And I already know that I can go out and get embarrassingly shit-faced and he'd still want to see me again because that's what I did on our first date (that's a completely different blog...).
So yes, at the minute, the garden's rosey. But it's still early days, nice exciting early days and unfortunately when you're picking out cards or changing your details on your MySPACE site, you can only pick single or in a relationship...there's no choice to pick, 'just started seeing a guy I like'.
So, if you happen to be reading this Mr...(you know who you are) don't freak out!
Opinions - Dating Nightmare Part 1 By Leah Scarpati
Why is dating such a nightmare?! I must admit I haven't really been on that many successful dates; I've only had 2 long-term relationships and 3 half-arsed attempts at them that didn't last more than five minutes. So in between those I've been on enough dates to be suitably apprehensive about how they'll turn out.
I've found that in my experience they go
Opinions - USA Neocon Maniacs are at it again, duping the lying western media propaganda machine with lies by Mo.
US backed ( 1000 marines advising, commandos and mercenaries)forces of Georgia ( birthplace of Stalin), sneak attacked Russian Peace Keeping Troops Thursday evening killing thousands of civilians (Over 2000 civilians are reported killed
). Under distraction of Beijing Olympics, Dick Cheney may well be heading the Neocon maniacs into new war fronts setting up for another cold war, diverting media attention from the disastrous economic situation in the USA.
Opinions - Mary Poppins, I Ain't! By Leah Scarpati
I may sound like an old spinster woman but I'm convinced I can drum up a following on this one. I was at the gym tonight (trying to work out) and I'll admit, was bloody knackered by the time I got to the changing rooms.
I'd had a crap day at work and all I wanted to do was chill out. Cue - screaming kids in the changing room. So I decided to escape
Opinions - David Icke blows away 400 people at a Free Public Meeting on Sunday, July 6th By Mo
Believe him or not David Icke is one of very few people who can hold an audience in
the palm of his hand for many hours, well beyond the one and a half hours reported on the internet.
His three and a half hour talk enthralled the audience with revelations beyond the scheming
Big Brother drones in the Tory and Labour parties to the fact that Neocons' behind the
Big Brother State
Opinions - The BBC Dipping into Youtube for Viewers By Mo UPDATED BBC's BBC Phil Hayton Denies All knowlege
The British Broadcasting Corporation, which is usually known simply as the
BBC, is the world's largest broadcasting corporation. It has 28,000 employees
in the United Kingdom alone and an annual budget of more than £4 billion.
Founded on 18 October 1922 as the British Broadcasting Company Ltd, it was
subsequently granted a Royal Charter and
Opinions - Response to The BBC Dipping into YouTube for Viewers By Martin Deane
Fire away Mo! Seconds out, round two.
I actually have a soft spot for the Beeb but no, it's not my unrequited love for Neighbours or the Archers. Forgive me for lumping them together, apparently they're different despite hugely annoying theme tunes, but you may not know where I'm coming from yet.
This is despite not having a TV licence which is how the BBC funds itself
Opinions - Lies And War Crimes By Michelle Dee
The words "weapons of mass destruction" were noticeably absent from the
speech by George W. Bush on the fifth anniversary of the Iraq invasion.
The apocalyptic rhetoric used to firstly motivate the political will
then move the might of the military forces was replaced by talk of
regime change and removing Saddam Hussein from power.
It is illegal to go to war in order to
Opinions - Censored By D R Callaghan
A few minutes ago I used the readers comments facility in the online Hull Daily Mail
to comment on the main story about the killing of Simon Murden.
Ironic is it not? that the police are unable to crack down on the alcohol-fuelled
yobs terrorising families, shopkeepers and the elderly, yet when faced with a
young man who needs medical attention they can pump six bullets into him
Opinions - The Sexuality of the 9/11 Attacks By Christopher Skolik
The Pentagon is itself a potent symbol of manhood and military virility.
It goes without saying that was an act of violent homoerotic self extinction and assault-as if the terrorists could not survive such an act of homoerotic penetration, their out dated belief system and self ideation would not allow it-no matter how metaphorical the act. Only the unification of sex and death could breach that gap.
Opinions - Iraq War Theme Park By Christopher Skolik
War seems to be a human necessity, a requirement on some basic level.
To counteract the dangers of random disorganised war springing up I suggest
we turn Iraq into a fully functioning war zone theme park -all the benefits
of paint balling but with the relief of tension that only live ammunition and
Opinions - Notes Toward a Chavology By Christopher Skolik
The local Hull 'chav' lad needs profiling and placing in his rightful context.
Fiercely proud of his 'thickness'- intelligence is not to be trusted, it might unleash all kinds of awful weirdness upon his world, a world he clings to with the whitened knuckles of the drowning man, the perennial cry of 'Don't get clever with me' echoes across council estates of the north ...
Opinions - Maureen Lipman at Pave By Sean
Just saw Maureen Lipman at a reading at the Pave.
It took two attempts to gain entrance. At the first attempt i was turned away on the grounds that it was a private function - apparently i didn't look 'Avenues' enough. I'm Avenues enough to have my taxes pay for it, mind.
I just got in in time to catch a couple of 'anecdotes' which mocked the poverty of working
Opinions - All At Sea Or Way Out West? (Orwellian Nightmare Or Whitehall Farce?) By D R Callaghan
Admiral Sir Alan West wants us to 'snitch' on our neighbours, friends and even on our own family. Who's he? I hear you ask. He's none other than the Government's new 'Security Minister'.
Isn't it comforting to know that we now have a 'Security Minister' (Big Brother?) looking after our 'way of life'?
The former First Sea Lord also warned that Britain faces a 15-year battle
Opinions - Candle In The Wind By Jim Higo
Who'd want to be a Bosnian landmine victim? Terrible injuries, lost limbs, scarred for life and then to cap it all, when you thought it couldn't get any worse, you get a visit from Princess Diana.
Just when it seemed your life had reached its absolute nadir, you see her coming at you with those big eyes, like a spaced out Desert Orchid.
Opinions - Depart For New Earth By David Sloan
Depart for new earth AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. Professor Stephen Hawking said recently that for the human race to survive we must gain a foothold on another planet, and as if by divine intervention our astronomers soon found another earth-like planet in the heavens.
It has a mass five times that of earth and is probably made of the same sort of rock with
Opinions - Trees Are Bastards By Sally Satan
Now amidst all the current chatter of climate change inevitably being a Bad Thing, the still small voice of calm must be heard.
How many people do you know who have died recently as a direct result of climate change?
And yet we go on, beating ourselves up for being human and not animal or mineral, and for ruining the planet. But we should
Opinions - The Reception of Wisdom By Kenton Hall
There is a story that I tell. I likely tell it far too often and one of these days, a friend or family member is going to sneak up behind me and garrotte me with a length of fishing line.
No, it's not the one about that. Or that one, either.
Now that I think about it, there are many stories that I tell too often.
However, the story I am referring to today recalls the moment
Opinions - Divided We Fall By Lee Cassanell
"The oppressed are allowed once every few years to decide which particular
representatives of the oppressing class are to represent and repress them" Karl Marx
So Tony Blair's pledge to end poverty has taken a kick in the teeth after the news that 300,000 (or 200,000 or 100,000 depending on which paper or website you read) more children have slipped below the line.
Opinions - Real Men Do Not Need Real Doll.com By Jo Allison
At age 12, little girls and boys should put Barbie and Ken back to sleep safely in their plastic boxes, as adults move on from pretend friends, to actual ones.
But for a select group of scary cyborg-lovers who prefer plastic to flesh, life size Real Dolls made from 100% silicone are the next step up from Barbie dolls. They make the perfect playmates, so I'm told.
But who exactly
Opinions - Goody, Goody, Yum, Yum - Racism and Jade Goody By Lee Cassanell
We all decry prejudice, yet are all prejudiced; Herbert Spencer
The problem with racism is there is currently no well known or vicious enough word that another race can use to discriminate against white people.
In fact during an extensive search of the internet the only even mildly offensive term I could find was
"Honky" and if you are white and offended
Opinions - In Response To Fiona Carr's Hands On Our Arts By Esther Windsor
I am writing in response to Fiona Carr's recent article Hands On Our Arts in
the Opinions section of thisisull.com :
to say that Hull Time Based Arts is alive and well.
In the article discussing funding of art and cultural services in Hull she says
'We have seen the collapse of Hull Art Lab, we saw Hull Time Based ArtsRead more...
Opinions - In Response to The Mental Alchemist's Save Our Free School Meals
Mental Alchemist shows an unerring ability to turn gold into lead with the mixture of inaccuracy,
sloppy thinking, and basic political illiteracy.
To start at the most basic there is not a Liberal Party Cabinet on Hull City Council.
Indeed, despite all the treachery and re-branding exercises, there is not even a Liberal on the Council.
Opinions - Hands On Our Arts By Fiona Carr
ThisisUll has good arts coverage and a clear interest in the vibrancy of the cultural scene,
even if it seems a bit indie/ethnic leaning.
It may well be that nobody is interested in the Art galleries and museums, or the
City Hall/New Theatre though there was a time events were featured on these pages around 2004.
However it is astonishing not one